Here’s a few tips on surviving the Christmas and the first days of the New Year without drinking alcohol.
Celebration is not about pushing as much alcohol down your throat as humanly possible and getting so drunk that you can’t remember anything.
How is that celebration?
The alcohol companies have their marketing machines in full swing at this time of year. Alcohol is everywhere. Alcohol advertisers are everywhere. Alcohol discounts are everywhere.
And yet alcohol will cause chaos in so many homes over the holiday season. That is the hidden consequence when a nation gorges on an insidious and dangerous drug.
Good cheer is spread through people, through good company, good conversation, jokes and laughter, food and merriment, everyone having a good time because that is what should happen when people are together, they have fun. Together is a wonderful place to be. “Let’s get together and feel all right” 🙂
The alcohol marketing will try to convince you that you cannot have fun without this drug. Remember, you are the source of the fun, not the alcohol.
I wish you the very best Merry Christmas feeling. Imagine the start you are going to give yourself for the New Year if you can summon up the courage to go against the grain, against that the common herd.
Speak to you in the New Year… Have a good one… Onwards and upwards!
Until next time…
Onwards and Upwards!
Thank you so much for your website it has helped me greatly.
I am 58 and have been trying to stop drinking for 12 years after starting back up after a 3 year sober period. Here in the US I was sent to AA, and after failing I’ve been sent back to AA over and over again…, when I left after 3 years sober I swore to never go back there because I didn’t believe their dogma or all the other stuff that has been programmed into my thinking.
After listening to lots of your videos I’ve realized I’ve been harmed by what has been taught me, stuff that I actually believed e.g. I have a disease, this is genetic, I am powerless over alcohol, etc. etc. etc. Now I am rethinking all I’ve been told and listening to what you are saying…, nicotine, alcohol…, same same. They are both dangerous, highly addictive substances that are toxic to our bodies (BTW I have never smoked so at least I don’t have to battle that!!). Everything you’ve said has rung clear in my mind: from corporate brainwashing as drinking being a normal part of life, to the bottles saying “drink responsibly”, to tolerance providing a reason that moderation is unacheivable, to aliens looking down and saying look at what these kooky feckers are doing (I loved that, it was so funny…, you were talking about cigs); to our lives funneled down to basically drinking and nothing else, in a fog all the time, and sick or getting over being sick.
The things you’ve said…, I’m responsible for putting the crap in my mouth and I’m responsible for stopping putting the crap in my mouth. That I will be uncomfortable but it will pass quickly, that once you leave drink behind you can start a whole new life but you must persist and not stay rooted in the past (with meetings, and calling myself an alcoholic, to counting sober days)…, but instead moving forward and being positive and to persist…, I persist…, I persist.
My last drink was on December 9th and I actually went to detox for 5 days because I was so messed up but I feel so much better already and I am trying to wash all the crud out of my mind and relearn what I need to know to stop the drink and go out and live my life free of the rat poison…., I am listening to you and I am feeling like I CAN do this and my life can be different.
Thank you so, so much Kevin.
Olympia, Washington USA
Thank you Kevin. You are an inspiration. Happy Christmas to you and your family. ?
Week 3 update (Tally)
So it’s been three weeks since I stopped drinking and here are the ups and downs, pro’s and con’s, of these first few weeks:
A lot of what Kevin says is making complete sense to me…, how we have created this habit over many years gulp by gulp, and body tolerance assures that we will continue to use more and more of the stuff, year after year always trying to get and keep that buzz we are looking for. But eventually we will hit a spot where the body can’t handle the quantities of alcohol we’re shoving down our gullet…, then we start having serious health problems, our hangovers start lasting for 2, 3, and 4 days at a time…, our lives are completely centered around alcohol and we are on autopilot, living in a fog, with seemingly no way out.
What has really been going over and over in my mind is how there is no such thing as normal drinking…, any drinking at all is abnormal. “Not drinking” is the normal condition of the human body.., just like not smoking is the normal condition…, these chemicals, alcohol and nicotine, are volatile toxic dangerous and deadly to the human body so who in their right mind would do such a thing…, or why would we continue to do such a thing knowing how dire it can be?
My mind still fights with itself when I say I’m done, I’ll never drink that rat poison again…, it tells me “you always drink again this is just another lame try at quitting and this isn’t the end”. But like Kevin says these are just adaptations that have happened in our mind and bodies to allow us to drink. These are automatic thoughts that we only need to recognize and see them for what they are…, the vestiges of a former life and former habit flailing in their death throws.
Sleep has been fitful but slowly getting better. I’ve had a couple 8 hour sleeps lately so I have to believe that it will get better just like Kevin’s vids explain. I decided to quit coffee and switch to tea since I was already up to 3 cups of coffee a day and I can see myself drinking even more than that (let’s face it, I live in the birthplace of Starbucks and coffee is everywhere!!)…, I had a cup of coffee at 4pm and that night I tossed and turned and only got 4 hours sleep so that was a big indicator that I need to control my caffeine intake and not let that become a habit substitute for alcohol.
I had some headaches at first but those have mostly passed.
My liver still pangs every now and then and it’s still a little uncomfortable to sleep on my right side but that is getting better too…, slowly.
I’m 80 pounds overweight so I started to exercise just like you Kevin…, I walk 1 hour every morning and then at night I work out in the gym lifting weights. This has been really great, especially the walk in the morning as at 57 years of age I’m a little sore and my joints are tight when I first get up and after the walk I am limber and feeling much better about the day a head. I’ve cut back on the size of portions of what I eat and am eating better foods: the stuff that will help my body heal itself from all the damage I’ve done. I’m also taking a one a day vitamin to help make sure I’m getting everything I need.
So far I haven’t had any urges or nagging thoughts of alcohol (knock on wood).., but I keep a mantra in my head that this stuff is toxic and dangerous and something I don’t want in my body. Also that it’s not the alcohol, that 95% of the problem is in my head…, so no one can make me drink, I have to take the bottle down, uncap it, pour it in a glass, and pour it down my throat. I have control of my drinking: Start now and don’t deviate…, start now and don’t deviate…, start now and don’t deviate.
I have been really agitated and irritable for the last couple of weeks but I think that is slowly getting better too. I just keep thinking how nice it is to not be hung over…, to not be obsessing over when/how/where/how much I’m going to drink. I can go through my day living in the day and seeing it as a great opportunity to rebuild the whole thing. This will all take time so I need to relax and take some time out every day for meditation and not let things stir me up so much…, in the end, all the things I’m agitated about aren’t really big deals…, and compared to the sickness and confusion that I was always in the agitation really isn’t that bad…, I just need to keep my thoughts positive and keep busy.
So when things get a little out of hand I go for a walk.., I meditate…, I have a list of small little projects I can work on.
I really look forward to clearing the 30 day mark…, but this time it’s not 30 days sober…, its not 30 days since I’ve stopped drinking. Now, it will be 30 days since I made the decision to live a better life, since I made a change for the better…, now it will be 30 days actually living my life. Thank you for all your help Kevin!!
Olympia, Washington USA