Today I want to talk about the right time to change.
There’s never a right time to change.
It’s just ludicrous to think that there’s a perfect time to make changes in your life.
If you’re looking for a perfect time, the only perfect time is now, at this time.
Pain shows up in your life for a variety of reasons.
Pain shows up in your life for one reason and one reason only:
to tell you that something is wrong.
That pain could be physical pain, it could be mental pain, something that is happening in your environment, with your relationships, with whatever, but you feeling pain is a sign that something is wrong with you, something needs to change.
You’ve to find the common denominator, you have to find the root cause of the pain, and once you find the real cause of that pain, then you can do something it.
You can make the changes that are needed to make the pain go away.
If you’re looking at this video about perfect time to quit alcohol, then you have some pain associated with alcohol and alcohol is the bottom line.
The lifestyle is the bottom line, and alcohol plays a lot of that.
Once you get rid of the alcohol, the pain will start to go away, once you’re following after something, your end goal, so you have to ask yourself what are you waiting for?
You might have tried to quit drinking a lot of times in the past, but every time you fail for one reason, and that reason is every time you put this stuff into your mouth, you give in to the temptation.
The temptation of the alcohol is stronger than the need for something better.
That momentary temptation, that momentary gratification that you need, that you want to get in your life is stronger than what you want in the long term.
I understand that.
I’ve done that loads of time in my life, my life has been about that up until a few years ago.
Just leading myself down one short little alleyway to find that instant hit after another,
and those alleyways are always dead ends.
They are never going to lead anywhere.
You have to always come back out again to the main road if you want to travel forward.
What happens if you went to the doctor tomorrow, and the doctor said ‘look. This is it. I’m sorry to tell you but you’ve got something wrong with your liver’’
I’ll use that as an instance because that’s the most common thing that people seem to care about.
There are over 200 conditions that can go wrong from drinking alcohol.
But let’s say for instance that he says ‘your liver is sort of half screwed’
And you say ‘Is there anything I can do about it?’
And he says ‘Yeah, what are you doing in your life? What’s your diet?’
And then you tell him about the alcohol, and he asks you how much you’re drinking and you tell him.
And he says ‘yeah, that’s your problem, you have to stop drinking. What’s the consequence if you don’t? Your liver is going to get worse, your fatty liver is going to turn into cirrhosis and once you get cirrhosis you’re screwed. I guess we can’t do anything for you, and you won’t get a liver transplant because you’re not famous, you’re not rich and because you’ve done this to yourself’.
What would you do then?
Would you hum and go ‘yeah I’ve got to commiserate with myself and have a drink, and go down a bottle of wine’?
You’d give up.
if you give a man a big enough reason why, he will put up with almost any how.
If death is there at your door, sickness first, a horrible sickness, a nasty shit sickness, and followed by a cruel death…and that is almost guaranteed if you don’t stop, then hat are you going to do?
You’re going to stop.
So what are you waiting for?
Are you waiting for the doctor to tell you something like this?
Because you continue on with the drinking, that’s the likelihood that something bad is going to happen.
Maybe it’s not your doctor telling you that you’ve got cirrhosis, maybe it’s your parent that’s saying ‘look you’re a tool. I don’t like what you’re doing to yourself, and I don’t like what you’re doing to this family, so get stuffed. Get off, I don’t want you anymore.’?
Or you’re waiting for your employer to say ‘you’re a dickhead. You’re not doing your job anymore. You’re fired.’
I’m not saying this because I want to be a dickhead myself, it’s not about that.
It’s about you saying these things to yourself and being realistic with your own life.
It’s easy to sit down and go ‘well, I don’t want to think about this, and I’ve got a really handy tool not to think about it and that tool is to sit there and drink myself to a stupor. No I don’t have to think about any of this’
But you have to realize that every drink you take makes your situation worse, and every drink that you don’t take makes your situation better.
So, it’s a no brainer which route you should be taking, which road you should be travelling down.
Keep that in mind when you’re thinking about buying stuff, about buying alcohol and putting it into your mouth. Just get real, you know.
There’s a quote – somebody said it’s Socrates but I’m not sure about that, seems a bit modern to me –
‘’the secret to success is to focus your energy not on fighting the old but on building the new’’
That’s what you have to do.
Don’t wait anymore, don’t wait until the perfect time.
Don’t wait until the doctor is knocking on your door and telling you that you’ve got to go to the hospital.
Don’t wait until your wife or your husband is opening the door and saying adios.
Don’t wait until something bad happens.
Until your kid turns to you and says ‘dad why are you drunk all the time?’, ‘mum why do you keep doing this to yourself?’
The other day, one of my nieces turned round at the dinner table.
My sister is the only one that smokes, she’s the youngest one, so she went out for a cigarette.
Just as she walked out the door I heard her say to her mum ‘’mummy, does Maria not care about living? Does she not care about her health?’’
She’s only 7, and she said that, and I thought ‘oh my God’
That’s basically it.
We have to see for ourselves what a 7 year old can see nowadays, and the information is out there.
It’s all there at your fingertips.
There’s no excuse.
At the end of the day, nobody else is being hurt by this except you.
You hurt other people but they have a choice to say ‘I’m not doing this anymore, I’m not sticking with this anymore’.
Some people have a choice.
Your kids may not, they still have to have you as mum and dad but…
The point is, there is no perfect time to quit.
The perfect time is right now, at this moment.
If you have any questions, leave a comment down below.
Go up to the website and sign up for the newsletter.
The audio will be there beneath the video.
You can also have a look at the transcript if you want to do that.
Until then, have a great week, have a safe week.
Keep the alcohol out of your mouth.
If you’re going to do it, do it now.
Don’t wait until New Year’s Day.
Take the action and move towards what you want to do with your life.
If you can do that then you won’t want to drink again, that’s the point.
THE RIGHT TIME IS NOW
Until next time…
Onwards and Upwards!
This just about says it all. My husband has been in detox 2 times since Nov. 2015 and is now in a nursing home for the second time.
He refuses to admit that it is alcohol but blames it on his anxiety.
I’ve given up on him.
Kevin, I feel so blessed to have happened upon your series; you have been more helpful and motivating than anything else I have read. I’m so lucky to have gotten the same alcoholic genes as my dad and his mother…not. I’ve been a heavy drinker for about 10 years (silently). I did it for “medicinal reasons”, of course. I’ve needed to dull everything, and alcohol did that for me. I love how you talked about pain..mine has been an ongoing emotional roller coaster. But lately, I’m noticing that I am fatigued all the time, and my belly is distended; I guess it does take death knocking on the door to finally get it. I quit on Monday July 4th; today is Wednesday, feeling a bit funky, but better, I think. I have absolutely no inclination to pick up a bottle again. I’ve been working on those foods you spoke of, to heal my liver, and also purchased herbals from the health food store 🙂 Thank you so much! Susan
Hey Susan, keep us up to date with how you’re getting on… Onwards and Upwards!
Thanks once again Kevin for the really good work you are doing. The message in this video was ‘to the point’..the message so clear. I fell off the wagon three years ago…after more than five years without alcohol. Almost immediately, I was a prisoner again and my drinking escalated. I am worn out from battling with alcohol…it is/has taken over my life. I have tried to stop but couldn’t. However…yesterday…I started detoxing….working with an addiction counselor. Yesterday I began building the new life…increasing the positive healthy actions…I woke up today feeling happy that I have taken action. I don’t have any support… so for me…I am willing to pay for professional support until I am well on my way ‘on the road back’…one step..one day at a time. Thank u soo much. Carol
You’re welcome Carol… welcome aboard
Good one Kev – like the alleyway and main road analogy, and also the quote about concentrating on building the new life rather than focusing on the old one.
Do we always have to hear you huffing and puffing on your lectures?
Hi Julie, there are a lot of videos where I’m just stood in front of the camera. It’s the message that counts, sorry you don’t like the delivery but I have to find the time somewhere and I do my best thinking while walking.
I’m sorry, Julie, but this is so ungracious a comment. I love the walking videos. Kevin gives us so much and, as he says, he has to fine the time somewhere. His walking is almost as inspirational as the messages he so generously delivers. I have started walking more myself. And there is certainly evidence that walking enhances thought.
Glad you like the walks Mandy.
I love the videos! they are inspirational
Hi Kevin. I’ve not drank since last Wednesday 7th Sept after signing up for your newsletters and watching your videos. Its Sunday morning now and I’m feeling quite good. Love waiting till the end of the day to check my mail and watch your latest vid. Really enjoy seeing you outdoors walking while you do video…as It’s really motiviating me to do the same.
Until tomorrow..Thank you!
Cheers Jack, I appreciate the message. I’m stuck in the house at the moment with a torn ligament, so I’m glad someone else is getting out there. Couple of days and I’ll be back 🙂
Hi Kevin. I look forward to your daily Videos. Otherwise I go on YouTube. I love the Hiking Videos, Very Inspirational.
Day 10. I woke up in a Bad Mood. Lots of Life Changes going on at the Moment. I had coffee in the Sun Shine with a friend. Thought about buying a bottle of Wine. Came straight back to Apartment, and Watched yesterday’s Video as I had not watched it. Big Mistake. Anyway. Watched and now feeling Good. I make short notes which I put in a notebook and keep in my handbag for when I return to the UK. I intend if friends try to influence me, to go to the Ladies and Read my notes or watch a Video, as they are short enough for that purpose.
I have just applied for FB Group, I found this helped me in the past with Soberistas. As I stated before they made the site membership only.
I like your Patreon, much better. Once I am settled I shall become a Patreon and purchase books etc, in appreciation.
I loved this Video, it sometimes feels as though they are coming just at the right time for how I am feeling. I believe in Fate, Spirite Guides etc.
This could not have come at a better time in my life.
Thank You. Keep going. Oh. Just look at how much you have changed in appearance since your First Week Video. At 56yrs I am blessed with good genes and I need to keep hold of them. Lol.
Laura? From Sunny Icmeler, Turkey. 3 weeks back to UK?
glad to help Lorraine… Keep those good genes working 🙂
Good morning Jack! Thank you for your encouragement and for sharing your strength with all of us. Last Sunday, 911, was the day of my last drink. I quit drinking many years ago for almost 20 years but with the death of my son and husband I slowly went down the slippery slope again. (I should have known better) Even well-meaning friends encouraged me to have a drink and “relax”. I love those friends but I am looking onward and upward. I am looking for new activities and have been staying away. Thank you again for your encouragement and I will let you know how it is going. I’ve started with the no-alcohol 30 day challenge. Thanks again and I will be in to touch. Also, I joined a gym in February for the first time in my life. Just since I quit I have put back on a few pounds – is that because food tastes better and also do you have any suggesions on diet? I did the 10 green smoothie detoxification a few months ago and I felt and looked so much better at that time. Would that be appropriate to do again at this time? I felt like I was eating better than I do on my regular diet. It was difficult but i did it. Yahoo!!!!! Thanks again for everything!! Onwards and upwards!!!
Thanks Kevin. BTW. Where is the hike that you do every day? I have a 25 mile/week commitment to help me during my “witching hours”. Thanks for the inspiration.
Thank you for your videos Kevin, they are helping me so much. Day 3 for me??
Good for you Laura… Keep it up
Great video keV, alcohol also a class 1 carcinogen..
Thanks again, Kevin. Great motivation to keep going! ?