Most people in life will only change if the habit is an ingrained habit that they’ve been doing for a long time, when there is enough pressure, or enough pain.
We’re creatures of habit, we generally do things on a pain and pleasure principle. So once you get in pleasure, it’s very difficult to change, very difficult to move away from pleasure, when you know that you’re moving into pain. And even if your mind is telling you that, that pain is going to be short lived, it’s very difficult to go from the pleasure into the pain.
But when that pain is turned up, and the pain becomes more than the pleasure, when the pain becomes more visceral than the pleasure, and that pain can be physical pain, it can be mental pain that you have it, it can be something that’s coming from internal, like, just your thoughts, and your emotions are getting to that level where you’re thinking, “I’ve got to make a change”, or it’s coming from the outside where somebody else is saying, “Look, if you don’t stop this, something’s gonna happen, there’s going to be consequences to this, and it’s a great time to change.”
But you have to understand that this type of change that is short lived, you know, once the pressure goes off, once the pressure is relieved, once the pain disappears, then the motivation often disappears along with it. So you have to be cognizant of a point about looking at somebody who is forced to change so that the idea is to think about you making the changes.
Now, while you’ve got everything in your control, rather than somebody saying to you, “Look, you’re going to make these changes now, because I’m forcing you to make the change.” That could either be a doctor who said or you know.. And you have to make these changes, otherwise, there’s going to be horrible consequences to you. It could be a partner, your spouse, who’s saying to you, “If you don’t do this, now, I’m going to leave you.”
Any of those things can be external, but it’s a forced change that somebody is putting on top of you. Whereas, if you say to yourself, “Well, I can see this”, push yourself out to a year’s time and imagine what is going to happen. Look at any situation in your life. And I guarantee you that if you’re poisoning yourself with alcohol, you can push yourself out.
You can take any different part of your life. And you can say, this is going to get worse. So look at that. You’re going to grow into that person, look at that person, that you’re going to be calm and say to yourself, “Well, do I want the shit that’s going to happen to me? This shit storm that’s gonna come about my way, in this area of my life and my relationships and my finances, in my spiritual life?” Everything that’s going to happen and say to yourself, “I am in control of things. Now I can stop that from happening. I can prevent all these things from happening. Am I going to do that?”
I drank alcohol for over 30 years. And one of the biggest reasons why that happened was because I didn’t have enough motivation to change. I didn’t have enough pain in my life to change, there was wasn’t enough pressure.
There’s some of the best motivations that you can have, a pain builds up, and you’re really thinking about, “This is the time to do it.” Get out there and do it. Because as I say, it’s one of the best motivations to make you go. It’s not a long term motivation. So you have to be aware of that. But while the pressure is there, do it. You want to do these changes. You want to make these changes happening in your life while you are capable of doing it.