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Quitting Alcohol – In the Middle of Every Difficulty Lies Opportunity

by | Stop Drinking Alcohol | 4 comments

Every single challenge in life has got a window of opportunity, has got something that you can pull out of it, that you can do something about.

Today, I want to talk about opportunity within the shit.

Einstein said that in the middle of any difficulty, there lies opportunity.

What he meant was that regardless of what problems you’re facing, there is an opportunity for growth, for taking something good out of it.

This is on the same lines as behind every cloud there is a silver lining.

There’s light at the end of the tunnel.

I think that’s true with anything in life, but it’s particularly true with alcohol or with addiction.

There are 2 ways of seeing things, in the positive light or in the negative light.

You can focus on either one.

I’m all about focusing on the positive because what’s the point in focusing on the negative?

I’m not talking about not seeing the bad things or weighing up good versus bad, pros and cons, that’s not the way I see things.

I think you have to do that.

You have to say ‘what’s the situation? These are the negatives and positives’, weigh them up and make an informed decision based on that.

Seeing things through negative viewpoint is like you saying you can’t do something or you won’t be able to do it, or making those value judgments based on negativity.

Those kinds of things only make you unhappy, and what’s the point in making yourself unhappy? Happiness is an inside job.

It doesn’t come from outside or from things, or from people, because you can have as many of those things in your life as can be thrown at you and still be a miserable bastard. Look around at these people who have got everything.

A couple of years ago, we went to a place called Monte Carlo, down in the south of France, one of the richest places.

It’s a small principality of France.

It’s where the Grand Prix is, all those areas.

You’d think these people would be happy, but no way.

It was like a wave of entitlement more than anything else.

‘Get out of my way. Who are you peasants?’

It wasn’t happiness.

But, you go up to a Buddhist monastery, any time i look at the Dalai Lama, the guy just seems to be brimming of happiness.

He found it inside.

You can say ‘that’s what he’s selling’, that’s what he is selling.

But it’s the kind of thing you can’t fake.

He looks like he’s genuinely happy, joking around and having fun.

Even when he’s talking about serious stuff.

Wayne Dyer said that in the beginning of his book Erroneous Zones, he said ‘I don’t want to be flipping about mental health’, and he’s talking about that from the perspective of you building your own health.

He’s not talking about mental patients.

He’s talking about the normal person’s health and how they think about themselves.

But, he said ‘I don’t want to be flipping about mental health, but at the same time, I don’t ant to treat it with the way Psychiatrists treat it with fancy jargon that no one understands, not even half of the psychiatrists understand what they’re talking about’, and it’s all designed so that they look good.

He wants to bring it down into normal life, tons of people can understand.

This is a fun process.

You have to look at your life like it’s a fun process.

If you have a failure, don’t look at it like it’s shit.

Don’t start asking where your life is leading you and saying negative things.

All the negativity is all selfish.

It’s all value judgment.

It’s what you have in your own mind about who you are.

Most of the time, it’s not true.

There’s no such thing as too fat or too thin.

Everyone’s got something they’d like to change about their bodies, or about their lives.

The whole point to this video is to show you that regardless of what issues you’ve got in your life, there is always an opportunity that you can pull out of that problem.

There’s always light at the end of the tunnel.

There’s always a silver lining.

And if you can find that, it empowers you.

First, it gives you power, it gives you knowledge about yourself, and you can use that knowledge the next time you come up with a problem.

This builds up your character, and builds up your personal repertoire of tools.

It gives you personal inspiration which is the best type of inspiration.

If you can inspire yourself by small amounts, every time you come up against a problem, think about it positively.

Think about how you can figure out a solution.

Come up on that solution.

Bring that solution into your life.

Put your solution into action.

I guarantee that the next time you do something, you have a bit more self-confidence about your own abilities to do these things.

It’s powerful.

It’s the only way we do anything in life.

Think first, action second, success or failure.

If you fail, don’t look at it like you being a failure, look at it like your choice was a little problematic, so how do you get around it?

You have a look at it and see where you went wrong, and you try it again.

If that fails, you try it again.

Eventually you will succeed and find the opportunity in everything.

The problem with most people is they don’t see the opportunity because they’re blind to it.

The old saying ‘there’s none so blind as those who refuse to see’ is what it all boils down to.

You have to look for the opportunity in order to find it.

If you don’t know, it’s there.

If you have any questions, leave them down below.

Come on over to the website and sign up for thee newsletter.

Hit the like button and subscribe.

Until next time, stay safe, keep the alcohol out of your life.

It’s the small successes that build to the big ones, it’s the little wind that builds up.

In the end, you will win the battle and be happy.

The battle starts up in your head.

Getting a great life starts there.

Everything good starts there.

IN THE ASHES OF ADVERSITY LIES OPPORTUNITY

Until next time…
Onwards and Upwards!

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4 Comments

  1. frank oconnell

    Kevin I get a bit pissed when you start quoting Wayne Dyer. Erroneous zones was a blatant rip off of Ellis . And Wayne was a salesman who never said an original thing in his life but was great at quoting others. Stay original my friend. After all the whole “self-help” industry is comical, because people are using OTHERS to help them. Self help is about helping your self, not searching outside of your self all the time.

    Keep er going Kev.
    f

    Reply
    • Kevin O'Hara

      I’ve read both Ellis and Dyer. They both represent very similar ideas, but I think they come at it from a different perspective. I agree that people in the self-help industry are using others to help them. That’s what I’m doing in a way. The best way to learn anything is to teach it to someone else. As for being a rip-off, there are no real new ideas, just reworkings of the same stuff over and over. Dyer from Ellis, Ellis from Horney and Fromm. The basic principles have been around since the first people who started dwelling on this stuff. It’s simple…work hard on yourself first, think positive thoughts, move in a positive direction, and good karma will flow your way. I related more to Dyer than Ellis and so learned more from him because of it. I get this same type of argument in the vegan movement, who said what and who ripped who off. Learning should never be about the teacher, always about the student. You are right, self-help is by nature about helping yourself, but you do need to learn from someone. I don’t search outside of myself all the time, only some of the time. As a lifelong learner, you have to take what you learn from others and build on it. Isaac Newton said “If I have seen further, it is by standing on the shoulders of giants.”

      Reply
  2. Mick

    In the self help industry its easy for people to water down their expertise by becoming experts on too much. Referencing or quoting others is a good way of utilizing others expertise. If you don’t reference others you could be asking others to believe you are the vestibule of all knowledge instead of an expert on mastering alcohol. (expert= someone who does the job on a daily basis)

    We all know quiting alcohol is about so much more than stopping drinking so advice/tips on goal setting, watching your diet et etc are always going to part of the needed package to kicking the habit. If Kevin reads some books, picks out the best bits, puts in plain English, great,suits me fine. There is and always will be some clever folks out there.

    This is a quote from 50 cent (its from my memory and may not even be word perfect but its getting my arse in gear so I don’t become one of the guys waiting)

    “All over the world, their are men waiting, they don’t know what they are waiting for. But one day they will wake up and realize they are too old even if it did show up”

    Love what your doing Kevin, your daily videos have been the biggest single factor in kick starting my life without alcohol. I would like to think I would have done it without you, but in all honesty probably not.

    Reply
  3. Lisa Bates

    Dear Kevin,

    Just wanted to say a huge THANK YOU. Also congratulations on your success and motivation and hard work doing your videos and podcasts and stayin true to yourself and helping others.

    This particular video was one of the BEST.And definitely something I needed to hear today.

    To be honest…because there is no point being anything else…i stopped listening to you. And cracked open the bubbles. Fell immediately back into the old habits with the same bullshit excuses. Has been about a month on and off.

    My biggest challenge at the moment is menopause and how easy it was to cover it all up with the numbness and dumbness of alcohol.

    I have lost 25 kg. And my goal was and still is to be fit and fab by 50. Which is now 3 weeks and 2 days away! And 3kg to my goal weight.

    So fuck it. I fell off the wagon. But i am strong enough to climb back on.

    Back to your daily videos. 2 or 3 times a day. Got some catching up to do! I have got this. Right? :). Going to listen to this video again. Quitting opens new opportunities. To overcome the difficulties is in your head right?.

    Thank you.

    Sincerely Lisa

    Reply

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