Life Without Alcohol | Be Kind to Your Future Self | SDA 21

Life Without Alcohol | Be Kind to Your Future Self | SDA 21

Welcome to stop drinking alcohol week 21.

On the site this week I answered 4 questions.

Does AA Work?

What counts as a drink?

Are you capable of giving up alcohol?

What are the signs that drinking is causing you harm?

Life without alcohol

My body hasn’t had alcohol in it for 21 weeks. I feel great. I lost 3 pounds, another 2 to go before I’m back on track.
I stopped going to yoga classes. The main reason was I don’t have the time in the morning. In total it takes about 3 hours including travel and prep.

Another reason is my Spanish isn’t that great yet. Although I get most of what’s going on in the class, I always feel like I’m missing out. Sometimes I’m concentrating on translating rather than yoga.

I bought a couple of DVDs so I can still practice. It’s something that I’m really growing to love. I feel much more flexible nowadays, and I think that’ll continue. It’d be great to carry on with the classes, so I’ll see the summer out and have a rethink in the autumn. Hopefully I can improve my Spanish a bit more by then.

Stop Drinking Alcohol Week 21 - Be Kind To Your Future

Be kind to your future self…

Don’t take the small pleasures of today at the expense of your future self. Drinking alcohol might give you short term pleasure, but at what cost….

You need to look at how you’re going to maintain your new life.

What are you going to do with all the free time?

What great things do you want to do?

Where would you like to go?

Who would you like to meet?

What would you like to learn?

You need to fix these things in your mind as possibilities…. We are all capable of greatness if we only apply ourselves. Find something that you love doing and just do it!

So, that’s the Stop Drinking Alcohol Week 21.
Thanks for visiting the site.
Until next time…
Onwards and Upwards!
Kev

Previous Tallies

Stop Drinking Alcohol Week 18
Stop Drinking Alcohol Week 19
Stop Drinking Alcohol Week 20

About The Author

Kevin O'Hara

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10 Comments

  • Marcel Messemaker

    Reply Reply June 10, 2013

    Nice work Kevin, I check in with you daily. I’m amazed how at ease you are in front of the camera. Your posts are brilliant. I’m sure many will agree. 🙂 Hello from New Zealand. Marcel.

    • Kevin O'Hara

      Reply Reply June 10, 2013

      Thanks Marcel, I appreciate the kind words!

  • Rochelle Laszczak

    Reply Reply February 17, 2014

    Hello Kevin,

    Re: Stop Drinking Alcohol Week 21 – Be Kind to your Future Self…………
    I really enjoy your version of quitting drinking alcohol as opposed to AA’s ways. I was court ordered to go to AA since April 2010 because of course I have 2 OWI”s (Operating Under the Influence) under my belt. I got them in when I was 46 for the 1st time ever (2 in 5 months) I know, sounds awful! Thankfully, no accidents – police just noticed my poor driving and that was that. one of the things I had to do is go 2-3 AA meetings per week and when you go, you have to get someone’s signature and preferably a phone #, but you can’t make them. This is what you show your probation officer once a month.

    The 1st few months of going to AA were ok. Then I was done talking about it the way they do. I don’t think I should call myself an ALCOHOLIC either. It is negative or a RECOVERING ALCOHOLIC. And with their rituals and 12 steps., and feeling like I HAVE to talk the same lingo they talk & BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, – JUST ISN’T ME, DAMMIT! I’ve found some meetings with nice people but can hardly make those times and places. I found some clicky before and after the meeting. Some people really brought me down like telling me the worse case scenerios and that it will probably happen to me. This is the last place I need to hear this shit and it’s a SUPPORT GROUP??? I was just getting more scared. But thank God I didn’t have to serve jail time.

    AA is not a “ONE SIZE FITS ALL” I did learn that. There’s a lot of fucked up people there that I don’t want to be around. No one HAS to drink alcohol, like you said. If a gun was at my head…I’d put the drink down really fast too!!! I get the feeling you aren’t really into God. That’s not why I don’t like AA though. I’m a Christian. But things you said like Yoga, putting good things in your body, etc., etc., are things will make a big difference in your success for sure.

    It’s been expensive and inconvenient, and in the beginning, scarey because I really didn’t know if I was going to go to jail or not after the 2nd OWI. Now it’s just and taking longer than I thought to get done paying for this damn interlock device monthly and they are keeping me using it twice as long as I thought. It was only to be one year and that started in May 2012! I NEVER failed a test either but they are making $MONEY$ (THE STATE AND OTHERS) There fucked up too. Which I won’t start on because I’m starting to make this too long. You probably get a lot to read from people now.

    My last requirement is to keep using and paying for this interlock device and so as long as I’m using it I have to get 1 AA signature a week which pisses me off. I resent that they make me go there. It’s like , well now this is you the rest of your life. I maybe went to one in the last year. I get others to sign my sheet because I can’t write 6 different hand styles and I refuse to sit for an hour even 1x per week and then try to think of something to say when I said it all a few yrs. ago. Now I just want to go on with my life, take care of myself and never do that to myself again.

    Do you think that’s wrong of me? ( about the way I get signatures and not go to real AA meetings) . They don’t know any different and it’s “anonymous too. At first when I had to see a probation officer, I was going to real meetings out of fear. Some signatures were just from friends too and she didn’t study the handwriting – Just counted the amount of dates I went per month and it went it a pile of shit that’s all filed away now with all my other shit. BUT I HAVE TO DO IT or make them think I did which is easy enough to do but still a pain because I don’t like to bug people to sign and don’t want to go to meetings. The longer this goes on with the blow device in my car, the longer I have to bug people to sign “a name”

    So just wondering what you thought of any of this? If I go to a meeting, I make sure it’s one where an “open speaker” talks and tells there story so I can just sit there, get a signature and get out.

    I have to stop writing – this is a lot for you if you have time to get through it and it’s hard to put the last 4 yrs. of details down.
    I don’t think you qualify as a “support group” unless maybe it’s a forum but I will tell the lawyer at the Secretary of State when ever I meet w/ him again about your website that I go to several days a week. It’s a legitimate one and I wouldn’t listen if I didn’t want to continue staying well. And he can look it up too.

    Doesn’t sound at all like you had DUI’s because you didn’t talk about doing any of what I HAVE TO DO/OR HAD TO DO BY LAW. And I wish I hadn’t messed up (It was a wake up call, a blessing in disguise to wake the fuck up! I could have killed someone and had to live with that!) before I got in the system. That’s what it took for me to wake up and be grateful. I had more than I thought and I thought “I SHOULD HAVE MORE” Why?

    I just think of it now as a game I have to play to get done and get on with a regular life. It’s a game. Tell them what they want to hear. Prove you went to AA and they will be satisfied. It’s all a game I’ve learned. So much has to do with making $ money$ off of us pathetic drunk loser’s ( I really don’t think of myself that way) I’m just exaggerating.

    Thank you, Kevin. I hope you had time to read all this and I will keep watching your videos.

    Rochelle

    • Kevin O'Hara

      Reply Reply February 18, 2014

      Hi Rochelle, I’m not against god or anything, I was brought up a catholic, I just don’t like organised religions. I’m not sure either way, but I know I don’t want to mix with religious types too much. It might be where I’ve grown up (although I don’t think so) but I find that there are too many people in church who would shake your hand one minute and stab you in the back the next. There’s plenty of folk going to church but not many who live like they should be doing if they really were religious. It’s easy to attend church once a week, stick a few coins into the box, and forget about your duties as a human being for the rest of the time.
      As far as you not getting your signatures, I don’t believe forcing someone to go to AA works. The AA doesn’t strike me as being an organization that has consistency across the board. I’ve heard some really bad stories (and some good ones, to be fair). I had a DUI in Ireland. I wasn’t required to take treatment. A bit like the kettle calling the pot black. A couple of months after the judge took my licence from me, and 600 euros as well, (not complaining about the sentence), I was sitting in a bar in the town and there he is at the bar. I had two or three beers while he was drinking his bottles of cider. He got up and walked out to the car park and hopped into his motor. What was I going to do? have him arrested? I think getting done for drink driving was a blessing in disguise for me also. There are a lot of cases where someone is seriously injured or killed because of a drunk driver. I must say I am eternally ashamed of my stupidity, but at least it stopped at no licence for a year instead of taking someones life.
      Thanks for the post Rochelle.
      Take care
      Kev

      • Rochelle Laszczak

        Reply Reply February 19, 2014

        Hi Kevin,

        Thanks for the quick response. I agree my getting popped for my OWI’s (operating under the influence) was probably a blessing in disguise for me too. I don’t have to live everyday knowing that I killed someone in the process. So I try to think on that when I have to piss my money away every month for this interlock device that I blow into in my vehicle several times a day to drive it. It is a small price to pay in contrast. And it will end sooner or later.
        I think they require us to go to AA until they decide to give us our license back because they want to see we are regularly doing something to help us not go back to drinking and because they can’t think of anything else – lol and maybe because it’s free. But I don’t like being forced because I got as much out of it as I’m going to. . You may go to other “related support groups but not enough around me that are free.
        I liked that you believe in God and I understand why you do not care for organized religion. I too, was brought up Catholic. I have nothing against it either but I know what you mean about the hypocrisy.
        I’m hoping this is the year I get my license fully restored and no more paying $80 to $100 a month for the interlock device and no more AA. It’s been good discipline anyway for me to wait to get home if I want a beer. There’s no reason I HAVE to drink in my vehicle.
        There was a lot more unfair bullshit about details that I could have went on about the device but I was getting too wordy. I think maybe just venting somewhat helped. Thanks for reading my comment. I look forward to your videos, Kevin.

        Rochelle

        • Kevin O'Hara

          Reply Reply February 20, 2014

          A lot of the reasons behind forcing people to go to AA is that’s all they can do at a local level.. All the big changes are made at a national/international level, where we have the smallest influence and the drinks companies, with their massive money warchests, have the biggest influence. At the end of the day, it boils down to money. There’s very little care about the ordinary person in this world, not once we go outside our own communities. And even that community care is eroding fast. I’m writing a lot of this stuff down at the moment. I hope to bring out a book in a couple of months just to try and help people to get over the first weeks and months.
          Don’t mind the venting, I do it all the time, it’s good for the head Rochelle.
          All the best
          Kev

          • Rochelle Laszczak

            February 21, 2014

            Hello Kevin,

            Thanks again for sending a comment so fast. I agree with you on AA being about as much as the state can do at a local level. All those sign in sheets just get thrown into a pile eventually, but by God it’s a requirement you HAVE to meet. AND it’s anonymous! even if they called someone who put their signature down for someone at a meeting w/phone number, there’s not a whole hell of a lot they can do but ask them if they were there.
            I’ve signed and put down my phone number hundreds of times – Never Once Received a Call from a probation officer or anyone.
            I prefer a variety of things like your site for instance, if I could afford some great one on one counseling 1x per month would be great because I need to talk about other things. Things about my own personal self that lead to drinking too much and get good feed back even in a good group counseling session (that I cannot pay for now but wish I could) I would get so much more out of that then 20 AA meetings where you just take turns going around the table saying whatever and – 1 rule is not to interrupt or try to get clarification while someone is talking (even politely). Sorry AA but I need give and take and getting ideas. That’s why I hate going now. It’s boring and I can’t wait to leave.
            I also agree with what you said at the national/international level – at the end of the day – it all boils down to money. It does. Even a retired police officer at an 8 hour alcohol class I had to go to 3 1/2 yrs ago admitted that the money generated from DUI’s is above and beyond and what it’s all about.
            And glad to hear you still need to vent. We all probably (drinking and the non-drinkers need it). I don’t mean a constant whiner, but you know what I mean.
            Thanks for sharing yourself from the beginning of your sobriety till present. I have to go back and listen to the ones I’ve missed since I only discovered this site a few weeks ago. This should help a lot of us struggling!
            Take care –
            Rochelle

          • Kevin O'Hara

            February 23, 2014

            Hey Rochelle, thanks for being a great example and sharing your story, the more people have the courage to share, the more it helps others who’re in the same position to believe that they can do it as well.
            Cheers
            Kev

  • khalid

    Reply Reply March 7, 2014

    Hi Kevin
    just like to say I stumbled across your you tube channel about 6 weeks ago. I am astonished at the power of your message in that it stopped me drinking in a jiffy. It has been very very difficult and continues to be so. Every time I’m on the edge I load up one of your walking/trekking videos ; )) watch it and then go for a walk myself!
    I also stopped smoking about 18 months ago and replaced that with vaping e cigs.
    All in all its been a good few seasons!
    I will always be indebted to you my dear Sir : )
    thank you.
    Khalid.
    onwards and upwards!

    • Kevin O'Hara

      Reply Reply March 12, 2014

      Good for you Khalid and thanks for posting your success story!
      Kev

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